It's official. Per the English Royalty, I am officially drab, fat, and dull.
Never mind that I woke this morning with the unshakable conviction that I need a vacation, and badly. From my whining, screeching kids. My whining, screeching, clinging, needy children.Whom I homeschool because they're so non-neurotypical that the public schools don't even know how to start. Both of whom woke me at 1:30 am today -- one to be tucked in and the other because his legs were twitchy and he believes in monsters. (No, not my mother! Other monsters.) Then the cats walked all over me until morning, and I woke with a sore throat.
I didn't even see Kate's dress -- sorry, Catherine's dress -- until the evening news, and now I'm totally bummed. I need to lose 40 pounds, 20 years, and two kids. And boy, oh boy, the money the Middletons spent on orthodonture was well spent, wasn't it? At first I thought the dress was too casual and a bit dowdy, but having seen her in it for a while, I'm convinced it was the right one. She looked modest and comfortable, not the least bit self-conscious about what she was wearing. She looked great. And happy!
Lucky Prince Harry has now graduated to Most Eligible Bachelor in the Kingdom. But it's not the same. ;)
Friday, April 29, 2011
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Dinner at the Ritz
Well, if I'm going to keep this blog, I may as well write in it, eh?
Let's see. Last night, I left the kids with my mom and went to a university function with The Husband. It was just a little dinner, but it felt like dinner at the Ritz. I had a beer and everyone at the table used silverware. Woo-hoo!
The Boy was totally terrified by my mother. I mean, she is intimidating, but really? She barked at him once or twice. ("Get back here and finish setting this table." "Don't let your sister beat the laptop on the table!") She initially was not going to let him play Wii after dinner, but relented when they established that he usually does. But after the laptop incident, he just sent himself to bed, as preemptive punishment. He told The Husband and me outrageous lies about the "mean" things she did to him, including denying him dessert and Wii, as well as "swinging the cat around by his tail and throwing him at The Girl". Heh? The anxious brain is a mysterious thing...
Anyway, I had key lime pie and adult conversation, so it was all okay.
Last weekend, I steam cleaned all the carpets in the house, so this weekend, I'm going to paint The Girl's room. The weekend after that is for stripping and waxing the kitchen floor. Can you tell I'm having company in May? Yeah... I'm also planting a lawn. What the heck, why not?
Speaking of gardening, both of my orange trees are a-goner. The navel is just planted too close to the elm, so it has permanent sooty mildew. (Who knew that elm tree would be so wide?) The pineapple orange is dying, and I'm not sure why. I'm thinking it was the "severe" cold this winter, but who really knows about these things? Oranges have so many freaking blights that all bets are really off. I was just starting to get reasonable fruit from that tree, too. If I replant, I'm getting another pineapple orange. Mmm. Lots of seeds, but delicious.
Anyway, that's about it. This week in homeschool, I found that The Husband is nearly too short to be a Roman Legionnaire. And he wouldn't be allowed to marry me anyway. ;) I'm sure there's more, but hey, everyone has stopped sleeping again, and I can't remember much more. Gotta start locking my door again.
In the mean time, I'll be plotting my escape again -- maybe next time to Taco Bell!
Let's see. Last night, I left the kids with my mom and went to a university function with The Husband. It was just a little dinner, but it felt like dinner at the Ritz. I had a beer and everyone at the table used silverware. Woo-hoo!
The Boy was totally terrified by my mother. I mean, she is intimidating, but really? She barked at him once or twice. ("Get back here and finish setting this table." "Don't let your sister beat the laptop on the table!") She initially was not going to let him play Wii after dinner, but relented when they established that he usually does. But after the laptop incident, he just sent himself to bed, as preemptive punishment. He told The Husband and me outrageous lies about the "mean" things she did to him, including denying him dessert and Wii, as well as "swinging the cat around by his tail and throwing him at The Girl". Heh? The anxious brain is a mysterious thing...
Anyway, I had key lime pie and adult conversation, so it was all okay.
Last weekend, I steam cleaned all the carpets in the house, so this weekend, I'm going to paint The Girl's room. The weekend after that is for stripping and waxing the kitchen floor. Can you tell I'm having company in May? Yeah... I'm also planting a lawn. What the heck, why not?
Speaking of gardening, both of my orange trees are a-goner. The navel is just planted too close to the elm, so it has permanent sooty mildew. (Who knew that elm tree would be so wide?) The pineapple orange is dying, and I'm not sure why. I'm thinking it was the "severe" cold this winter, but who really knows about these things? Oranges have so many freaking blights that all bets are really off. I was just starting to get reasonable fruit from that tree, too. If I replant, I'm getting another pineapple orange. Mmm. Lots of seeds, but delicious.
Anyway, that's about it. This week in homeschool, I found that The Husband is nearly too short to be a Roman Legionnaire. And he wouldn't be allowed to marry me anyway. ;) I'm sure there's more, but hey, everyone has stopped sleeping again, and I can't remember much more. Gotta start locking my door again.
In the mean time, I'll be plotting my escape again -- maybe next time to Taco Bell!
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Life as I know it.
Well, another day, another post. Today I woke, showered, made the bed, emptied the dishwasher, fed the kids, made their beds, cleaned up their rooms, and started the laundry. Then I did The Girl's OT exercises and taught for a few hours, followed by mopping the kitchen and dusting/vacuuming the entire fecking house. (No kidding -- master bedroom, two kids' bedrooms, office, living room, family room, plus two couches.) Then I made a foray for a huge load of groceries, put all of them away, taught another hour of school, and CRASHED for a nap. Can you say "hot dogs for dinner"?
Green Girl had a recent post of things she loathed. I'm adding "sweeping the kitchen and then watching little bits of the pile scurry away back toward the baseboards". Eew.
While I was out getting groceries with two wacky children, I also stopped so The Boy could get a haircut. Yes, he wanted a haircut. Yayy! My hair is starting to get kinda limp and fuzzy looking at the ends, so it's about time for another of my thrilling spa afternoons at The Hair Cuttery. (I love the high life!)
My hair is finally starting to show grey streaks, and I'm thinking I have basically three choices. First, ignore it, let it grow out, and look like a hippie Earth mother. Second, dye it and have roots all the time. Third, remove all mirrors from the bathroom.
What do you think?
Green Girl had a recent post of things she loathed. I'm adding "sweeping the kitchen and then watching little bits of the pile scurry away back toward the baseboards". Eew.
While I was out getting groceries with two wacky children, I also stopped so The Boy could get a haircut. Yes, he wanted a haircut. Yayy! My hair is starting to get kinda limp and fuzzy looking at the ends, so it's about time for another of my thrilling spa afternoons at The Hair Cuttery. (I love the high life!)
My hair is finally starting to show grey streaks, and I'm thinking I have basically three choices. First, ignore it, let it grow out, and look like a hippie Earth mother. Second, dye it and have roots all the time. Third, remove all mirrors from the bathroom.
What do you think?
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
That last 20 pounds is never going to go away at this rate
Chick Fil-A's peach milkshakes -- like crack cocaine, only more addictive. Even if you've only had it once, you're still hit with occasional uncontrollable cravings. Thanks, brother-in-law!!!
AAAK!! I just googled the peach milkshake, and it was a limited-time offer!! I'm doomed to a life of no peach milkshakes! It's like being in detox. Fortunately, there's still this. I'm never going to shake this last 20 pounds unless I get some sleep, am I?
AAAK!! I just googled the peach milkshake, and it was a limited-time offer!! I'm doomed to a life of no peach milkshakes! It's like being in detox. Fortunately, there's still this. I'm never going to shake this last 20 pounds unless I get some sleep, am I?
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Summer... Yeah...
Well, summer's here. The A/C is on. The pools are open. The swimsuits are in place. Popsicles are in the freezer. I'm whining to get the windows tinted in my car again. But this time, I'm asking for it for my Mother's Day and maybe Teacher's Day. (My school doesn't have much of an end-of-school carnival, but the teacher does get a small token of the students' and school board's gratitude.)
It's not really summer, of course. Not high summer. We're in normal summer now, until maybe mid-June. Then something shifts in the cosmos, and it becomes unreasonably, brutally, stupidly, and insanely hot. Too hot to grill outdoors before sunset. Too hot to go to the beach during the day. Just in time for everyone from Wisconsin to visit Disney. Luckily, Disney air conditions the outdoors, so that's okay.
Ah, summer. (Can I move to Wisconsin now?)
It's not really summer, of course. Not high summer. We're in normal summer now, until maybe mid-June. Then something shifts in the cosmos, and it becomes unreasonably, brutally, stupidly, and insanely hot. Too hot to grill outdoors before sunset. Too hot to go to the beach during the day. Just in time for everyone from Wisconsin to visit Disney. Luckily, Disney air conditions the outdoors, so that's okay.
Ah, summer. (Can I move to Wisconsin now?)
Friday, April 8, 2011
The Martyr Diaries
It's not a full moon, is it? ;)
Seriously, the boy woke me at 1am to ask where his yellow colored pencil was. I told him to look in the colored pencil bin on the school table. He says, "Hey! Good idea! Thanks!!" At 2am, the girl woke me to watch her close her window and then then tuck her in again, complete with the entire litany and ritual. There wasn't any genuflecting or incense involved, but close.
Tired today. But that's nothing new.
The kids have taken to covering the carpet with trash and crumbs and then complaining when I vacuum. They're five feet, 90 pounds, and eleven years old. But I just don't have the will to make them vacuum. My husband thinks I'm acting like a martyr. Yeah, ya think?
Martyr (Noun) -- one who suffers for a cause. YA THINK?!!
Seriously, the boy woke me at 1am to ask where his yellow colored pencil was. I told him to look in the colored pencil bin on the school table. He says, "Hey! Good idea! Thanks!!" At 2am, the girl woke me to watch her close her window and then then tuck her in again, complete with the entire litany and ritual. There wasn't any genuflecting or incense involved, but close.
Tired today. But that's nothing new.
The kids have taken to covering the carpet with trash and crumbs and then complaining when I vacuum. They're five feet, 90 pounds, and eleven years old. But I just don't have the will to make them vacuum. My husband thinks I'm acting like a martyr. Yeah, ya think?
Martyr (Noun) -- one who suffers for a cause. YA THINK?!!
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