Well, The Husband came home from work today, this first day of school, and found me curled up in the fetal position on the couch. Yeah. We had mixed results.
The Boy wouldn't wake up, then he wanted to eat all the Lucky Charms, then he complained he wanted to go back to sleep. But by mid-day, all the screaming died down, and he actually did some work on his own. (Note: make boy use the bathroom before viewing Institute for Excellence in Writing. Also, wash pants.)
The girl complained when she had to work this afternoon, but she was okay. I was just curling up for a nap when The Husband got home. He said, "Oh my gosh! One day of school and I find you this way? Oh dear." We had a good laugh and then we ordered Pizza Hut for dinner. To celebrate, of course. (Could there be another reason?)
Monday, August 29, 2011
Friday, August 26, 2011
My kids and other hurricanes
For those keeping score, hurricane Irene is missing Florida completely and slamming full-force into Manhattan. So we're fine, but the northeast is on their own. ;)
In other hurricane-like news, my kids are acting like wild animals. I swear if I left, they'd be feral within a week. I'd come back and find them chewing on bones on the floor and rolling in corn chip crumbs. They'd be unwashed and overloaded on screen time. The house would be completely buried in trash.They make me crazy.
In other hurricane-like news, my kids are acting like wild animals. I swear if I left, they'd be feral within a week. I'd come back and find them chewing on bones on the floor and rolling in corn chip crumbs. They'd be unwashed and overloaded on screen time. The house would be completely buried in trash.They make me crazy.
Monday, August 22, 2011
My school.. In the middle of my house...
Well, every time I get online to say I don't have anything to say, I find something, so here goes.
School has half-started here at my house, meaning that The Girl has started. I've enforced a bath and bed time schedule for the school year, mostly for me. (The Boy has about as much self-control as I do when it comes to going to bed early. And it always feels early for us.)
I've put together a daily schedule for who's studying what when. I know this is anathema to unschoolers, but if I don't put it down in ink, science and history don't get done. And who wants kids in the house who wonder if the sun will ever become a shooting star. (It IS a star, after all, right?) So, The Girl starts at 8:30, and The Boy starts at 10:30. Some of the time overlaps, but not much. I just feel like since we're in middle school, we should kick it up a notch.
Even in classical education, the first three years is all memorization, but after that, the kids are supposed to start using what they've memorized -- applying it. I think that The Boy should be able to apply what he's learned so far to what he's seeing this year. And he should be able to take ownership of at least some of his work. (I say this every year, so don't get all excited or nuthin.)
Oh, and most importantly, we've named our middle school: Knowledge Middle School. (We finished Learning Elementary School in the spring.) We have a logo and will have t-shirts by the weekend.
Cool, eh?
School has half-started here at my house, meaning that The Girl has started. I've enforced a bath and bed time schedule for the school year, mostly for me. (The Boy has about as much self-control as I do when it comes to going to bed early. And it always feels early for us.)
I've put together a daily schedule for who's studying what when. I know this is anathema to unschoolers, but if I don't put it down in ink, science and history don't get done. And who wants kids in the house who wonder if the sun will ever become a shooting star. (It IS a star, after all, right?) So, The Girl starts at 8:30, and The Boy starts at 10:30. Some of the time overlaps, but not much. I just feel like since we're in middle school, we should kick it up a notch.
Even in classical education, the first three years is all memorization, but after that, the kids are supposed to start using what they've memorized -- applying it. I think that The Boy should be able to apply what he's learned so far to what he's seeing this year. And he should be able to take ownership of at least some of his work. (I say this every year, so don't get all excited or nuthin.)
Oh, and most importantly, we've named our middle school: Knowledge Middle School. (We finished Learning Elementary School in the spring.) We have a logo and will have t-shirts by the weekend.
Cool, eh?
Monday, August 15, 2011
Mmmm.
You have to love a great, inexpensive casserole...
...that way, when no one will eat it, you won't mind putting it down the disposal quite as much.
What the heck?! I even told them: it's just chicken, spaghetti noodles, milk, a little cheese. YOU LIKE ALL THESE FOODS. What the heck? Who doesn't like chicken tetrazini? White sauce? Check. Pasta? Check. Cooked chicken? Check. Seriously, people! Oh well.
Aside from my kids rejecting comfort foods, there's nothing going on here. Not much drama at all.
The Girl is stimming like crazy today. I'm about to lose my mind just sitting here. If she's a little droopy, she starts sucking air. It's similar to the sound when you burn your hand. It's an inhaled SHHHHHHHHK noise. And she does it over and over and over, interspersed with a strange hooting noise and the sound of her snapping her head back. Over and over. When she's too awake, it's the same except she's exhaling and whipping her head forward. That's got to be good for her vertebrae.
We've tried six different meds already and none help. Some don't do anything, some knock her unconscious, and some just make her sleepy. Right now, we're using something that makes her sleepy. We upped the dose and gave it to her in the evening, but it doesn't do squat. It must wear off during the night.
The public schools down here start on the 22nd, but we're starting on the 29th with The Husband's university. I've got a new school room setup, and I'm liking it. It's more book cases and a drafting table. (They keep telling me that the incline helps with her handwriting. Frankly, I've never understood why, though our bodies are vertical, the tables are all horizontal. It gives me a crick in my neck thinking about it.) The church had the annual school supply drive and Blessing of the Fleet this weekend. This is the first year that I've gone up with the teachers and kids for it. After three years, I finally feel like a teacher.
I cleaned the house on Friday so I could relax on Saturday. Tragically, The Husband was giving a final exam on Saturday and I had NOTHING to do. I swear. I feel like I worked so hard to get a day off, and it was totally, blindingly boring. It was thunder storming too hard to take the kids out, even if I could have persuaded them to go. It was also my birthday, so that made it just a little worse.
My sister and I share a birthday, a year apart. My mom calls it "Planned Parenthood". Ha ha. Basically, my sister slept through the night for the first time at 3 months old, and I was born 9 months later. The doctor asked my mom, "How about Monday for inducing labor?" and it just turned out to be the same day. To make a long story short, my sister has agreed to be 33 again this year, and I've agreed to be 32. Sounds fair, since I really feel 32 instead of 49. I mean seriously, I expected to feel a lot smarter at 49, but I really don't.
So, we're slowly ramping up for school, dodging lightning, and trying to find something to do. (Did I mention that the ocean temperatures yesterday were measured at 82 degrees? So you know the pool isn't much better.) Maybe we'll just lie in the cool dirt under the porch until November, like any sensible dog.
And in case you're curious, NONE of the birthday cake ended up down the disposal. My kids are quirky, not insane. ;)
...that way, when no one will eat it, you won't mind putting it down the disposal quite as much.
What the heck?! I even told them: it's just chicken, spaghetti noodles, milk, a little cheese. YOU LIKE ALL THESE FOODS. What the heck? Who doesn't like chicken tetrazini? White sauce? Check. Pasta? Check. Cooked chicken? Check. Seriously, people! Oh well.
Aside from my kids rejecting comfort foods, there's nothing going on here. Not much drama at all.
The Girl is stimming like crazy today. I'm about to lose my mind just sitting here. If she's a little droopy, she starts sucking air. It's similar to the sound when you burn your hand. It's an inhaled SHHHHHHHHK noise. And she does it over and over and over, interspersed with a strange hooting noise and the sound of her snapping her head back. Over and over. When she's too awake, it's the same except she's exhaling and whipping her head forward. That's got to be good for her vertebrae.
We've tried six different meds already and none help. Some don't do anything, some knock her unconscious, and some just make her sleepy. Right now, we're using something that makes her sleepy. We upped the dose and gave it to her in the evening, but it doesn't do squat. It must wear off during the night.
The public schools down here start on the 22nd, but we're starting on the 29th with The Husband's university. I've got a new school room setup, and I'm liking it. It's more book cases and a drafting table. (They keep telling me that the incline helps with her handwriting. Frankly, I've never understood why, though our bodies are vertical, the tables are all horizontal. It gives me a crick in my neck thinking about it.) The church had the annual school supply drive and Blessing of the Fleet this weekend. This is the first year that I've gone up with the teachers and kids for it. After three years, I finally feel like a teacher.
I cleaned the house on Friday so I could relax on Saturday. Tragically, The Husband was giving a final exam on Saturday and I had NOTHING to do. I swear. I feel like I worked so hard to get a day off, and it was totally, blindingly boring. It was thunder storming too hard to take the kids out, even if I could have persuaded them to go. It was also my birthday, so that made it just a little worse.
My sister and I share a birthday, a year apart. My mom calls it "Planned Parenthood". Ha ha. Basically, my sister slept through the night for the first time at 3 months old, and I was born 9 months later. The doctor asked my mom, "How about Monday for inducing labor?" and it just turned out to be the same day. To make a long story short, my sister has agreed to be 33 again this year, and I've agreed to be 32. Sounds fair, since I really feel 32 instead of 49. I mean seriously, I expected to feel a lot smarter at 49, but I really don't.
So, we're slowly ramping up for school, dodging lightning, and trying to find something to do. (Did I mention that the ocean temperatures yesterday were measured at 82 degrees? So you know the pool isn't much better.) Maybe we'll just lie in the cool dirt under the porch until November, like any sensible dog.
And in case you're curious, NONE of the birthday cake ended up down the disposal. My kids are quirky, not insane. ;)
Thursday, August 4, 2011
To sleep, perchance to dream (about flunking high school!)
Last night I was doing the major-stressing-out thing while trying to get to sleep. This can only mean that I'll be waking up with the failing-high-school dream. AGAIN. (Monday night, I actually dreamed that I was registering The Boy for high school, but somehow they thought I was going as well. I missed the first day of classes, and they gave me a suspension. I wasn't even trying to attend!! And why can't I at least flunk out of college? HUH?!)
What to do? Okay, I'll just think of something I can't worry about. Ready?
Falling leaves. Mmm. Just falling anywhere they... Damn, that stupid dead maple tree is still in the ground next to the... Damn, I still haven't submitted the landscape request to the Homeowners' Association. Oh wait.
Butterflies. Mmm. Flitting around... I wonder if the pesticides that the lawn guys put on the house are killing all the butterflies. We sure haven't seen many this... Oh wait.
Chocolate. Mmm. Of course, chocolate is fattening. I wonder if I'm still under 195 pounds. That weight I lost last year is coming back fast. Oh damn, I wonder if it'll cause my pancreas to... I was supposed to make The Boy a lesson on diabetes/insulin so he'll stop eating pop tarts. But I already looked and found nothing good... Oh wait.
Dingos. "The dingos ate my baby!" That won't work.
Kittens. How cute. Yet, how many are euthanized every... Damn, the cat was shaking its head again today, and probably needs to go to the vet. I wonder how long until its next appointment anyway. How am I supposed to know... Damn. And I can't put those drops in her ears. The vet'll just have to figure something else out. I wonder if I flossed enough to fool the dentist tomorrow?
Solar energy. I wonder if the solar hot water heater is hail resistant. Or covered by insurance. Was I supposed to tell the insurance company? Remember that time they left a nail hole and the water leaked... I really should get those light tubes put in the living room. And get a new couch. I wonder how much is in the "emergency fund" or if there'll be any of The Husband's summer school pay left over after the dust settles. When do the CD's mature, so I can get another on the same schedule? Was it September first? And the frickin life insurance comes due then, too. I need to call TIAA-CREF and get life insurance through them. But I should lose 25 pounds before I do that -- no need to show up overweight. When was the last time I checked with Merrill-Lynch on the contents of my Roth IRA? The stock market. Oy vey. And The Boy wants to go Up North again for Christmas, but it's so expensive to get all those clothes just for one visit, even if we only to to NC. We're supposed to go Up North in the summer because everyone'll be on vacation. But we'll have to find a place to stay. I wonder what that'll cost. But not the same place as last time because the floors were like ice. And why can't The Husband teach Summer A next year so we can go on vacation in August instead of May? It's too frickin' cold up there in May. God forbid we just sit around again like this year. Of course, we did have a vacation in May this year to his family reunion. Damn, I was supposed to send the picture of the four of us to his sibs. I could just post it on facebook, but then I'll be targeted by white slave dealers. Isn't that situation in the horn of Africa horrible? But the kids are so beautiful! They really are. When was the last time The Girl ate anything that wasn't a fruit or fat-based? I mean, really, she can't live on bacon fat and blueberries. Can she?
This just isn't where I need to be. Is there anything I can think about that I cannot possibly worry about?
Sunshine. I wonder how I get an appointment to see the dermatologist about this itch on my arm. I've been keeping cream on it forever and telling the GP that I'm going to the dermatologist, but I don't. I wonder what it is. He'll just say it's stress-related and use the cream, right? But unless I do, I'll have to tell the GP that I'm a loser again. Besides, if I go I can get checked for skin cancer, because I got so many bad burns as a kid. I mean who knew...
Moonlight? Lesson plan not done. And why, why can't I visualize the moon phases. I know that if it rises in the evening, it's full, but that's about all. I never could understand orbital mechanics. Why is that?
Is there anything in the universe that's not all about me?
Religion? When is the church going to teach catechism classes for kids? No one else is home-tutoring theirs, so we're raising a generation of liturgically illiterate kids? I could get some kind of book or something. Maybe from the Lutherans, but I'm not sure if I can teach it convincingly. Noah and all that?
The rotation of the Earth? We're rotating around toward the sun again, and I have got to get some sleep!
Maybe I should take up yoga. The Consumer Reports claims that it cures absolutely everything -- because according to that Nature episode on stress, I'm a goner. I think our Wii does yoga, but I think getting the heck away from the kids for a while would be nice. I wonder if my parents are getting me a spa morning and lunch with my husband for my birthday again this year. That was nice.
Hey, I had to wear capris today, and they felt weird on my knees. That's a sure sign that summer's gone on too long. But at least tropical storm Emily is falling apart. For now. There's a sixty percent chance it'll re-form. But The Husband doesn't think so. I really should empty out the garage so we can get the cars in for the next hurricane. I wonder if I still have all the wing nuts for the hurricane shutters. Yeah, I think they're in the candy cabinet, next to the cookie cutters. You know that my metal cookie cutters are rusting? Yeah, I have 200 cookie cutters that I NEVER use, but I'm unhappy that they're rusting. I need to declutter. Hey, my new bookcase came out pretty well, considering that the lumber I used is warped and the joints don't meet perfectly. I mean seriously, I'm going to fill it with books anyway. In about three more weeks when the paint cures. I need to find something to put on the back of the bookcase because it's butt-ugly and faces the foyer. Maybe a kind of cloth or something? Damn, I need to buy some mesh to make more laundry bags because ours are getting ratty. I wonder who sells it. I really should hang The Girl's swing in her room. I think between glow sticks and a wander through the roof joists I could do it. In this heat? Sheesh.
I wonder if global warming (excuse me, climate change) is real. Seriously, my crazy brother keeps sending me links to that quackery web site. He still doesn't have his little girl in physical therapy. I wonder what he does all day if he doesn't do anything I would consider to be a house-husband's job. I need to clean my bedroom. I wonder where the beach towels and swim suits belong, other than the end of my dresser. I mean, it works pretty well there, but the view of it from the next room isn't very tidy. Man, I'd love to get a new closet built right there with some extra storage above it. I think it would cost about $500, but so would the paving stones next to the driveway. Why don't I have any hippie friends who want to help me do this kind of home improvement? Why don't I have friends? Damn, I wonder how Patrick's buddy Austin is doing. I should email his mom and make a playdate. My poor child. I mean, everyone says that homeschoolers have more friends than public schoolers because you really only make friends out of school anyway, but the kids down the street from us would eat my son alive. How on Earth am I going to get him to stay on a regular schedule and do school work this year? I always have to be the adult, and he always plays at being the French resistance. Like it's our job or something.
At least the... snxxx. (Then I wake up six hours later in a cold sweat because I can't remember my locker combination. My middle school locker combination.)
What to do? Okay, I'll just think of something I can't worry about. Ready?
Falling leaves. Mmm. Just falling anywhere they... Damn, that stupid dead maple tree is still in the ground next to the... Damn, I still haven't submitted the landscape request to the Homeowners' Association. Oh wait.
Butterflies. Mmm. Flitting around... I wonder if the pesticides that the lawn guys put on the house are killing all the butterflies. We sure haven't seen many this... Oh wait.
Chocolate. Mmm. Of course, chocolate is fattening. I wonder if I'm still under 195 pounds. That weight I lost last year is coming back fast. Oh damn, I wonder if it'll cause my pancreas to... I was supposed to make The Boy a lesson on diabetes/insulin so he'll stop eating pop tarts. But I already looked and found nothing good... Oh wait.
Dingos. "The dingos ate my baby!" That won't work.
Kittens. How cute. Yet, how many are euthanized every... Damn, the cat was shaking its head again today, and probably needs to go to the vet. I wonder how long until its next appointment anyway. How am I supposed to know... Damn. And I can't put those drops in her ears. The vet'll just have to figure something else out. I wonder if I flossed enough to fool the dentist tomorrow?
Solar energy. I wonder if the solar hot water heater is hail resistant. Or covered by insurance. Was I supposed to tell the insurance company? Remember that time they left a nail hole and the water leaked... I really should get those light tubes put in the living room. And get a new couch. I wonder how much is in the "emergency fund" or if there'll be any of The Husband's summer school pay left over after the dust settles. When do the CD's mature, so I can get another on the same schedule? Was it September first? And the frickin life insurance comes due then, too. I need to call TIAA-CREF and get life insurance through them. But I should lose 25 pounds before I do that -- no need to show up overweight. When was the last time I checked with Merrill-Lynch on the contents of my Roth IRA? The stock market. Oy vey. And The Boy wants to go Up North again for Christmas, but it's so expensive to get all those clothes just for one visit, even if we only to to NC. We're supposed to go Up North in the summer because everyone'll be on vacation. But we'll have to find a place to stay. I wonder what that'll cost. But not the same place as last time because the floors were like ice. And why can't The Husband teach Summer A next year so we can go on vacation in August instead of May? It's too frickin' cold up there in May. God forbid we just sit around again like this year. Of course, we did have a vacation in May this year to his family reunion. Damn, I was supposed to send the picture of the four of us to his sibs. I could just post it on facebook, but then I'll be targeted by white slave dealers. Isn't that situation in the horn of Africa horrible? But the kids are so beautiful! They really are. When was the last time The Girl ate anything that wasn't a fruit or fat-based? I mean, really, she can't live on bacon fat and blueberries. Can she?
This just isn't where I need to be. Is there anything I can think about that I cannot possibly worry about?
Sunshine. I wonder how I get an appointment to see the dermatologist about this itch on my arm. I've been keeping cream on it forever and telling the GP that I'm going to the dermatologist, but I don't. I wonder what it is. He'll just say it's stress-related and use the cream, right? But unless I do, I'll have to tell the GP that I'm a loser again. Besides, if I go I can get checked for skin cancer, because I got so many bad burns as a kid. I mean who knew...
Moonlight? Lesson plan not done. And why, why can't I visualize the moon phases. I know that if it rises in the evening, it's full, but that's about all. I never could understand orbital mechanics. Why is that?
Is there anything in the universe that's not all about me?
Religion? When is the church going to teach catechism classes for kids? No one else is home-tutoring theirs, so we're raising a generation of liturgically illiterate kids? I could get some kind of book or something. Maybe from the Lutherans, but I'm not sure if I can teach it convincingly. Noah and all that?
The rotation of the Earth? We're rotating around toward the sun again, and I have got to get some sleep!
Maybe I should take up yoga. The Consumer Reports claims that it cures absolutely everything -- because according to that Nature episode on stress, I'm a goner. I think our Wii does yoga, but I think getting the heck away from the kids for a while would be nice. I wonder if my parents are getting me a spa morning and lunch with my husband for my birthday again this year. That was nice.
Hey, I had to wear capris today, and they felt weird on my knees. That's a sure sign that summer's gone on too long. But at least tropical storm Emily is falling apart. For now. There's a sixty percent chance it'll re-form. But The Husband doesn't think so. I really should empty out the garage so we can get the cars in for the next hurricane. I wonder if I still have all the wing nuts for the hurricane shutters. Yeah, I think they're in the candy cabinet, next to the cookie cutters. You know that my metal cookie cutters are rusting? Yeah, I have 200 cookie cutters that I NEVER use, but I'm unhappy that they're rusting. I need to declutter. Hey, my new bookcase came out pretty well, considering that the lumber I used is warped and the joints don't meet perfectly. I mean seriously, I'm going to fill it with books anyway. In about three more weeks when the paint cures. I need to find something to put on the back of the bookcase because it's butt-ugly and faces the foyer. Maybe a kind of cloth or something? Damn, I need to buy some mesh to make more laundry bags because ours are getting ratty. I wonder who sells it. I really should hang The Girl's swing in her room. I think between glow sticks and a wander through the roof joists I could do it. In this heat? Sheesh.
I wonder if global warming (excuse me, climate change) is real. Seriously, my crazy brother keeps sending me links to that quackery web site. He still doesn't have his little girl in physical therapy. I wonder what he does all day if he doesn't do anything I would consider to be a house-husband's job. I need to clean my bedroom. I wonder where the beach towels and swim suits belong, other than the end of my dresser. I mean, it works pretty well there, but the view of it from the next room isn't very tidy. Man, I'd love to get a new closet built right there with some extra storage above it. I think it would cost about $500, but so would the paving stones next to the driveway. Why don't I have any hippie friends who want to help me do this kind of home improvement? Why don't I have friends? Damn, I wonder how Patrick's buddy Austin is doing. I should email his mom and make a playdate. My poor child. I mean, everyone says that homeschoolers have more friends than public schoolers because you really only make friends out of school anyway, but the kids down the street from us would eat my son alive. How on Earth am I going to get him to stay on a regular schedule and do school work this year? I always have to be the adult, and he always plays at being the French resistance. Like it's our job or something.
At least the... snxxx. (Then I wake up six hours later in a cold sweat because I can't remember my locker combination. My middle school locker combination.)
Monday, August 1, 2011
A sign of the Apocalypse...
...and in church, none the less!
I swear, on all that is holy, that I actually saw a woman in church in her swimsuit yesterday. No, not under a beach cover-up either. The woman was wearing an actual swimsuit in an actual Episcopalian church.
At first I thought, how tacky to wear a spandex halter top in church. Then I noticed the black spandex miniskirt with the slits in the side. My second thought was, tennis? Then it hit me. Swimsuit. In. Church. Midriff showing, love handles oozing around inside the skirt and over the top, back fat squeezing out of the halter top. But it technically was a top and skirt, right? No one will notice, right?
RUN! HIDE! THE HORSEMEN CAN'T BE FAR BEHIND!
And you know the scary thing? She really didn't stand out that much.
I swear, on all that is holy, that I actually saw a woman in church in her swimsuit yesterday. No, not under a beach cover-up either. The woman was wearing an actual swimsuit in an actual Episcopalian church.
At first I thought, how tacky to wear a spandex halter top in church. Then I noticed the black spandex miniskirt with the slits in the side. My second thought was, tennis? Then it hit me. Swimsuit. In. Church. Midriff showing, love handles oozing around inside the skirt and over the top, back fat squeezing out of the halter top. But it technically was a top and skirt, right? No one will notice, right?
RUN! HIDE! THE HORSEMEN CAN'T BE FAR BEHIND!
And you know the scary thing? She really didn't stand out that much.
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