Taking the Plunge

Big news -- we've committed to homeschooling this fall! (I know -- it's a little like deciding to have children, but it's big for us!) I just have to write a letter to the county and tell them. THEN the real work starts. Between The Husband (certified to teach in the CT public schools), and me (helped write five years' worth of Individual Education Plans in FL), we can do this. I'm knee deep in Sunshine State Standards for 2nd and 3rd grade. It's FUN! And I haven't said that about my job in years!

If I thought that The Boy could harness the synergy of 17 other freakin' bright kids in the same room, I'd keep him in the public schools. But his nervous system just can't handle it right now. What I'd like to do is put him back in the schools at 5th grade, so he can make the transition to middle school the year after with his little nerdy friends, but we'll see. I'll probably keep The Girl. Again, we'll see.

The one real loss in homeschooling is that you miss out on the explosive synergy you get when you have bright kids working together. And synergy is what makes think tanks so awesome and makes IT departments really rock. But you do what you have to do, when you have to do it. And it's now.

In addition to working on curriculum and unit plans all weekend, I also built a set of shelves to hold the homeschooling stuff. (AM I EVER STIFF TODAY. I have got to start getting some exercise. This is silly.) The shelves require one more stop at the hardware store. I'm starting to realize that having no money is going to take the fun out of scheming to get that new reciprocating saw... Maybe it's time to hit up the Brother In Law. YEAH! THAT'S THE TICKET!

It also occurs to me that if I homeschool, I'll have time to fix up the house in the summer. Yayyyyy! I'm already scheming a trip to visit The Sister in the mountains when the leaves turn. That's studying botany, right? :)

Vacation Time -- that long strange trip...

Well, it's almost "vacation" time again. To be more specific, it's time for our trip Up North. A vacation is a trip you take without your children. So, tragically, this is not going to be a vacation. I must say, however, with the completion of toilet training, this ordeal has become far more enjoyable. Now if they'd just stop puking in the car...

Y'know, I know I'm jinxing myself, but my kids are actually starting to take care of themselves. The Boy brushes his own teeth and (if he can keep his mind on the job), and he may even be taking his own shower by the end of the year. (Mostly, right now, he just wanders around the bathroom in varying stages of undress, making rude noises and enjoying the echoes.) I don't know the last time any of them pooped, but I know they're handling it because we keep running out of Kan-Doo wipes. (How did anyone live without flushable wipes? REALLY!) The Girl? Hmm. Well, The Girl can push herself on a swing. That's real progress! (The Boy can't!) She's starting to catch on to self-care stuff like putting hair bands in, but bathing, brushing, etc. are still out of her reach. Must add that to curriculum...

Ah yes, curriculum. (Must add that to spelling list....) I had started making a list of "things to learn", aka "goals" for the kids. Yesterday, I started on the "Addition The Fun Way" with The Girl and found that certain things had to be in place before I sat down with her. Hmm. Lesson preparations. Must make spreadsheet... I started a "math for The Girl" spreadsheet yesterday and it turned out really well. Not one to leave well enough alone, I tried to convert it into Microsoft Access, but no dice. Must be a trade secret...

The Social Word of the Week? COOPERATION. Cooperation means everyone helps. The Kids were tag-teaming me last night. Here's how it goes. The Boy loafs around instead of peeing/brushing/going to bed -- basically, he irritates me until I yell. Then The Girl seizes the moment of confusion and starts loudly demanding that I repeat one of her favorite phrases. Then while I'm trying to tell The Girl "no", The Boy starts shouting all of them, over and over. I tell him that it's mean, and we're trying to teach her NOT to repeat stuff over and over. As I get angrier with The Boy, the Girl screams louder. UNTIL! Bwaa-whoooom! Vesuvius!! Boy do they have my number. The Boy and I had a long talk about cooperation and helping. And I still didn't have to sing "El Coquille" for The Girl. Yay!

Then I headed for the gin bottle. JUST KIDDING! The Boy called me in two more times to say good night. He has this (not!) endearing way of whining "Mo-o-o-o-o-o-o-m!" Typically, the third time I come in there, ready to fight, he says in his most pitiful voice, "I need a hug..." This is not usually a demonstrative child, so I'm LOVING IT.

Today is the last day of his Lego camp at the museum, with his BFOP (best friend on planet). He was pretty happy the first two days, then he was a little edgy, then yesterday he got into a fight. His irrational fears are coming back, his level of agitation is up, he stopped eating breakfast -- the whole public school stress level thing. I have no idea how I'm going to break it to him that he's homeschooling this year, but I think he is. He's going to complain bitterly that he won't have any fun without his school friends. Truth be told, he spent as much time trying to kick his friends as he did playing with them, but they were a constant source of amazement to him. Like a moth to the flame he was drawn... But his nervous system just can't handle the public schools right now.

I do want to get him back into "real" school by 5th grade -- in two years -- so he can try making the transition to middle school. The synergy produced by bright kids is irreplaceable. Right now, he can't take advantage of it because of his nervous system, but the time will come when he'll want to. Hopefully, he'll be able to.

The Girl. Hmm. I worry about The Girl. I think I'm going to have to set up a trust for her long-term care. We were 37 when she was born, so she'll probably outlive us by at least as many years. Right now, I don't see her living on her own. Maybe she'll hit her stride, maybe someone will fall hopelessly in love with her and marry her, maybe -- who knows what. In the mean time, I need to help her fit in: learn to add, learn to pull information from text, learn to take care of herself, learn to be sociable, learn to learn. Oye.

But in the mean time, I have to figure out how to get everything we need for two weeks into a compact car! We're driving 8 hours, hotel overnight, driving 8 hours, brother's house for two days, driving 8 hours, cabin on the lake and in-laws for a week, driving 8 hours, BFF's beach house for three days, drive 4 hours, brother's house overnight, AutoTrain home. The lake house is gorgeous but the bathroom is tiny and cold. And usually the weather's cold, too, and THAT'S GOOD!!! No one believes us when we say it, but for us, COLD IS GOOD. Mmm... Cozy... And hopefully worth all that driving.

Next blog, remind me to tell you about THE BUDGET. Ouch. ;)

Mayhem, murder, and hens

It's been a fast-food week. Not necessarily McDonalds, but "fast". The Boy has been at Vacation Bible School in the evenings, and The Girl refuses to go. So while the other parents drop and run (to the local pub), I'm sitting around, making sure that The Boy doesn't "rev" up too much, and The Husband is home with The Girl, trying to find something edible.

This morning I made a gallon and a half of mac-n-cheese. It was surprisingly expensive and gross, in an "Omnivore's Delimma" sort of way. I swear, some marketer did some serious color analysis to find that pale orange hue -- it makes me happy just looking at it, and I don't even like mac-n-cheese! I was going to say, I should paint a room that color, but that would be very gross.

Not much on the schooling front. My Dear Friend is having trouble keeping her son officially "disabled". They insist that by age 9, his complete reliance on a cochlear implant should be transparent. Heh?

The weather is officially "broken" here. The high is going to be 89 and the low is going to be 72 -- for the next six months. Welcome to summer on the peninsula. I swear, we *were* going to keep a temperature graph this summer on the kitchen wall, but what's the point?!

The chickens continue to fascinate me. The only hitch now is that when they reach about three years old, they reach "hen-o-pause", and you have to replace them. And by replace, I mean kill and eat them. Oh deeeeeear... That's a hiccup in the plans. Maybe someone will do a hen exchange for me -- stew hen for chick. Sounds like they're getting the good end of the stick, and I won't have to kill a household pet. I have no idea how long they live, but I want eggs, dammit. I'm not fighting the zoning board for ordinary birds.

I'm also continuing drawing hen houses late into the night. The Husband thinks I'm crazy. Well, he *did* -- until he ran across a 1950's horror movie in which bored housewives turn to witchcraft and murder. Now, he's thinking $100 in lumber and hinges may not be such a bad deal after all! That's my man -- avoiding witchcraft and death. Think I can still get a new power jigsaw out of this deal...?

In which I learn that my kids are actually pretty quiet.

They've been making me actually WORK at work, so no posting. ;)

Homeschooling hasn't been a very serious effort yet. In preparation for building a seige machine, The Boy is learning about warfare: Infantry, Cavalry, Artillery. He did a which-is-which quiz yesterday (Clone Trooper? Infantry. Wizard throwing bolts of electricity from the castle ramparts? Artillery. Tie Fighter? Cavalry.) and drew me a sample of all three today, with mixed metaphors. (Evil skeleton army? Infantry.) Can't complain. Tomorrow we move on to chapter 2 -- Vikings!

Went to the schooling store today and got him some reading comprehension stuff and then to Michaels Crafts for some nice starting-to-tie-shoes stuff for The Girl. The Boy seemed interested. Maybe peer pressure will pay off after all.

Other than that, we've been hanging out, re-establishing our pecking order, learning about volume levels in an open-floor-plan house.

The Boy had a sleepover on Wednesday night. Apparently, The Friend's parents have a higher tolerance for crying, screaming, and tattling than I do, as witness their behavior when The Friend came over to play today. Man-0-man it that boy loud. The Friend's parents have a really huge house, so we all had a nice discussion of small houses and the need to keep it down a bit.

In other domestic news, the lock on the kitchen door stuck itself in the "locked" position and refused to let me close the door -- the latch refused to retract into the door. Can't close the door, can't open the door. Reminds me of the song -- can't go over it, can't go under it, gotta go in through the door. I disassembled the door knob, found that I STILL couldn't make the latch retract, and hence couldn't remove the old door knob. So I broke it off. Felt like a real man. I loaded up The Girl (screaming), The Boy and The Friend (both yelling) into the car and went off to Lowe's in search of door latches. Hoo boy. I actually handed the old latch to the sales clerk and told him, "If you can give me one of these, I promise to leave!" He did. We did.

I'm going to enjoy the quiet for a few days. I thought my kids were noisy, but apparently not. I guess that's a good thing? ;)

I've been doing a lot more research on hens this week. For some reason, I'm obsessed with getting three hens as pets. I know the town will shut me down if the neighbors complain, but I still like them. Suburban mom in search of an authentic life. Strange that the town will let me keep (up to four) rabbits for slaughter, but not three laying hens. Hm. Maybe I'll have to talk to the Town Fathers about this.

Nothing more to report. I was late for dinner twice this week, and work's getting a little crazier. The Husband is complaining of stomach problems. It seems to be a virus, and I think The Boy is suffering a bit from it. Whatevah. The Girl was just frantic with The Friend in the house, and is just plain loud lately. (See a trend?) If something displeases her, she just lets out a loud, whining, gutteral yell. The first thing we're going to have to do is to cut down on the yelling. That may play in the public schools, but it's not going to play here in Momland. ;)

Just to keep my panic level up, I looked up the curriculum goals for 3rd grade. Did you know that learning "Froggy Went a Courtin'" is a part of our curriculum goals. And the Phys Ed goals include "chasing, fleeing, and dodging"? Pardon? Hm. Maybe the chickens could be used for phys ed. Hmmm. Must work that angle...

children and livestock

Quick dip on the rollercoaster yesterday when I remembered I have to actually work for pay tomorrow. Bummer. I can't wait to quit my job.

I bought two 16" chairs and two adjustable tables, along with a few workbooks. Last week, I set up a chart so we could plot the high/low temperatures, but I just saw the forecast -- same high and same low for the next four days. Oh yeah. It does this all summer... Might as well take that down until Fall. ;)

I had been bemoaning the lack of livestock (and nature in general) at our house here in suburban heck, and my mother has found the solution. Apparently, in one of the local 55-and-over communities, there has been a "no cats or dogs" rule for some time; however now, some nice lawyer found a loophole. If you are found to be disabled by depression, you fall under the Americans with Disabilities Act, and if you doctor prescribes a pet for you to help with your depression, the residents association is required by law to let you have one. My kids are both under the autism umbrella, so that makes them disabled. Disabled kids = therapy hens! We almost peed ourselves laughing!

http://www.omlet.us/homepage/homepage.php

Yes folks, it's thaaaat simple!

the end of an era?

Well, tomorrow is the last day of public school -- potentially the last day of public school for a long time.

Today is the "Awards Ceremony" at the school, when children are given awards for "Excellence in Spelling", and "Principal's Award for Good Citizenship". On the other hand, everyone gets at least two awards, and last year a child actually received an award for "Exemplary Playground Activity". Seriously -- once we're all above average, there will be no one left to be breathtaking.

The Husband just approved the purchase of chairs with 16" seat height. Then he told me he may or may not be able to pick up extra work next summer. So I told him, fine, I may or may not be able to pick up work of my own next summer. Hah! I am woman, hear my MS degree roar!

Started reading about trebouchets last night. Turns out they used to hurl all kinds of nasty stuff with those medieval catapults -- and the Romans before them were worse! Diseased horses, body parts of prisoners of war, burning resin. I tell ya, The Boy is going to love this!

So, my father thinks I should definitely not homeschool my kids. Well. So what?

I have two kids just finishing 2nd grade -- The Boy is gifted/ADD, The Girl is multi-VE/autistic. Here's what I told him:


"You'd have to see The Boy in the classroom to really understand why I'm considering this. He has weeks where all he wants to do is kick the other kids in the ankle, then he has weeks where all he can do is pace back and forth across the back of the room, and then he has good weeks where he does most of his work except his writing assignments. (He has trouble organizing his thoughts into speech and writing, and he needs help.)

"Three years ago, we started him in the non-gifted kindergarten program at a different elementary school, just to give him another year to get his social skills together before starting first grade. And at the end of 2nd grade, we're still waiting for it to kick in. He doesn't bow to peer pressure or competition. ("That Boy has 200 Reading Counts points -- you'd better get on the ball!") He doesn't value the stickers and medals that the other kids work for. Recognition makes him jumpy and unhappy. We learned a long time ago that big groups of kids make him nervous. He's okay one-on-one, but when they start producing that "puppies in a box" effect, his brain overloads.

"This is not the environment in which he learns best.

"There are no small private schools that a) I can afford or b) have the teachers with the skills/understanding of wacky kids. There are homeschooling clubs in the area that have a weekly meeting with spelling bees, activities, and freeze tag. The YMCA has a homeschooling gym class. He never sees his classmates outside of school, but he sees his best friend usually every weekend.

"The Girl pays no attention to her peers. She's picking up bad behavior from them, and isn't learning her academics. She needs more one-on-one, and she needs more "kinesthetic learning". (Divide the 11 beans into groups of three -- you get 3 groups with 2 beans left over. 11 / 3 = 3 with a remainder of 2.) She needs more read-and-tell reading work. (Come to think of it, The Boy does too.)

"Both of them need to learn to tie their shoes and ride a two-wheeler bike. The Boy and I are going to research and build a seige engine this summer. The Girl and I are going to read Little House in the Big Woods and do, I don't know, something for it. I'll probably also do some math with them. I'll take them to the food co-op "divide up the shipment" work day, keep a weather graph, etc.

"I don't see any other way to get them grown and educated without completely stressing out The Husband and me. School is making us wrecks, and frankly, the kids aren't learning. What would you do?"


The Husband is with me on this, but he's not sure that The Boy and I will refrain from yelling at each other all day. We're both pretty hard-headed.

Either way, I'm starting to feel like I did when I was first pregnant -- alternating between excited and terrified. So, I'm starting to remember what I learned from that experience. Take it easy, don't overthink the process any more than I have to, and get plenty of rest. And don't buy everything I think I'll need. For God's sake -- all you need for a new baby is a blanket, a sock drawer, and diapers.

So, this is what it looks like from the top of the roller coaster...